Update

Quick update before I go to bed:

To be honest this last week has been pretty stressful. A friend and I are still in the middle of planning our trip to Italy and Budapest, and we leave in less than a week. Somehow a nice little trip to a neighboring country turned into something of a cluster****, and a very expensive one at that. There are three planes, four trains, several buses, four carshares, tons of shuttles to and from places... you know what, I'm not even going to finish the list because it'll just stress me out and I won't be able to sleep again.

I'm excited to go, I am, I'm just nervous that something will go wrong, and there seem to be quite a few places it can go wrong. Perhaps the stranger I met online won't show up to drive me to my next location. Perhaps booking a flight that we can't possibly get to two hours ahead of time was a mistake. Maybe buying train tickets that get us to Grenoble at one am was a poor choice, especially considering that I live 30-40 minutes away by tram...and the tram will most likely be done for the night by that point. I supposed we can sleep with the hobos and their dogs...

If it does work out, however, it will be both amazing and incredibly exhausting.

Grenoble --> Lyon --> Genoa --> Milan --> Budapest --> Vienna --> Venice --> Florence --> Rome

No. This is not a month-long trip. Just shy of two weeks, actually. Good. Ness. What have we gotten ourselves into? And we're doing it "on the cheap," meaning RyanAir - which always uses the most inconveniently-placed airports, just to make your life that much more complicated - and buses, which take 10 times longer to get anywhere. It doesn't help that we only had like two weeks to plan it.

I also bought tickets to Poland for Christmas which was a whole other animal.

Grenoble --> Paris (3 hours) --> Beauvais (45 minutes) --> plane to Warsaw --> Warsaw to Bydgoszcz (4 hours), Merry Christmas. Bydgoszcz--> Tarnowiec (8 or 9 hours, maybe 10), Happy New Year. Tarnowiec --> Warsaw (5 or 6 hours)--> Beauvais --> Paris (45 minutes) --> Grenoble (3 hours).

I'm starting to think that with all the extra trains, buses, and shuttles, RyanAir isn't really much cheaper at all. I'm tempted to just not go anywhere for our last break. Or maybe just travel around France.

Besides that I am actually working here...more or less, so I've also been trying to plan lessons. I did not study education, I don't know how to plan a class, so that's also been stressful. I did manage to put together something on anglophone-country flags and it seemed to work pretty well today. Some of the teachers are really helpful, they stand in front of the class and help me explain things, they make an effort. Some teachers, though, are really hard to work with... gah, I sort of wanted to smack them. They just sit in the back of the class, tell me to do whatever, and stare off into space. That's literally what they were told NOT to do. Again: not actually a qualified teacher. I come to a foreign country to do a job I don't know how to do, speaking a language I'm not 100% fluent in, the least they can do is stand up there with me and offer the slightest bit of support.

It hasn't all been hair-pulling though. Last weekend one of the Canadian assistants invited us over for Canadian Thanksgiving (which neither of the Canadians were able to explain the significance of... still a mystery to me. Maybe Canada was just jealous of our gluttonous ways?) It was a really nice way to end the weekend. There was actual real food. "Are you actually surprised that people cook real food?" one assistant asked me when she how shocked I was seeing a plate of home-cooked chicken and some sort of quinoa concoction.

Um...yes. Compared to my pathetic "dinners," it was gourmet. I really need to learn how to cook something besides overdone scrambled eggs...

Last week a bunch of us went out to see Gone Girl, I went to this really great tea house called Jardin du Thé with a couple other girls, I went to a bar with a few other assistants.

But overall the week has been stressful. If I felt like getting up I'd get my camera and take a picture of my computer and desk, they're literally covered in post-it notes, one on top of the other at this point. I have so many to-do lists I don't even remember what I did with them. I can't wait until we actually leave for Italy so I can remember why I like to travel, because at this point it seems to be more stress than it's worth.

And now it is one in the morning, I have ten billion things to do tomorrow, so I'm going to go to sleep. Bonne nuit.

Week One: Done, not dead but almost

First week done. I have no idea how I survived today.

Yesterday I got a stress migraine made worse by dehydration. There are migraines and then there are migraines, the ones that travel down to your shoulders and make it painful to walk, I have the latter, yay. As much as I love it here, the first week was tough; today I could barely form sentences.

Everyday all week I've been meeting tons of new people (which, for me, is terrifying/exhausting enough when it's in English, let alone French), leading classes I wasn't prepared for for in a language I'm not quite fluent in, I've also been trying to organize both my trip to Poland for Christmas and my trip to Italy and Budapest which starts in a week (and we still don't have half the stuff figured out), if you've ever tried to organize a trip on the cheap, you know how tiring it can be.

Everyday I had new students, so every morning before school I was nervous, before every class I was nervous, when the teachers looked at me like I had something prepared and I looked back at them like they had something prepared, I got more nervous, the inevitable improvisation made me nervous, when I met the people I will be babysitting for, when I was trying to figure out what plane to take back from Poland, etc. etc.

Considering I'm someone whose stress level tends to go from zero to panic in about 10 seconds...eh, not fun.

Overall, though, the classes are okay. I'm a little annoyed at the other teachers though. Today was the first time at least some of them had something prepared. They know I'm not trained to be a teacher, I'm not meant to lead the class the whole time, it's not my job to completely organize the English curriculum for them, yet it seems like most of them expect that from me. I was also told to find a way to speak English throughout the whole class. So far 95% has been in French, which is fine I suppose, it's mostly me presenting myself and explaining how Washington State does not = Washington D.C., but it's exhausting. At the same time I have 16 separate classes, there is no way in hell I'm planning 16 different lessons a week, but since I don't know how the much better the older kids are from the younger ones, I don't really know how to adapt the lessons.

I don't know, I'm so tired. I'm going to stare at a wall for a few hours now...or sleep, whatever.

The Kids

The children. There are a lot of them. I teach six classes Monday, three on Tuesday, and six or seven on Thursday. Each class has...eh, like 20 students. That's about 300 humans a week. I will never learn their names, but they have all learned mine. When I walk around the school I constantly hear "Ola!" "Ola, tu vas travailler avec nous aujoud'hui!?"

I was walking out of the gates the other day and a crowd of them swarmed around me and started talking to me, it was really cute.

One girl raised her hand in class and asked me if I came all the way to France just to teach them.
"Yes"
"Oh, c'est gentil!" (That's nice of you!)

I feel a lot more comfortable with the kids than with the adults, to be honest. Haha, probably since my French is about at their level, and kids are less... judge-y, I think. They're honest, sometimes too honest, but not judgmental.

I like them. They're all very interested in me and where I come from, it made me wish  had prepared a better first lesson for them all. I was told the first week would be observation, but when I got in the class I found out the teachers hadn't even started English yet (the kids have been in school for about a month already) and it seems like they expected me to have more planned out than showing them where I'm from, explaining the difference between Washington DC and Washington State, and teaching them "my name is." So...it was a bit awkward.

Babysitting

I found a second job! And a third, and perhaps a fourth...

I few months ago a woman posted on our Grenoble TAPIF Facebook page saying that she was interested in an English-speaking babysitter for her kids, I responded and have kept in contact, and I finally met her today. It's about an hour north of where I live, so it's a little out of my way, but I'm glad I accepted.

I walked toward her house where her daughter was waiting for me. I started to say something in French, then she said "I speak English" in perfect English. I was confused, for a moment I thought she was American. It turns out the whole family lived in Chicago for two years, the parents have them in special English classes, and they try to have anglophone babysitters. I then met with her equally-nice friend who needs an English tutor for her son, and would I be interested in a couple other students because they have some friends who might want lessons. So, looks like I might be making a little extra money, and it's a great way to integrate a little better into France.

So needless to say I'm very happy. I'm fascinated by how perfectly everything seems to be working out here. The housing thing worked out perfectly. The other day I was exhausted and I literally just sat in my bed and vegged out for a few hours, and I realized how at home I felt. I never did that in Montpellier, the rooms were too gross and prison-like. Living with a family gives me a chance to actually improve my French (like I said, I've spoken more French in the last couple weeks than I have in the last seven years). And now this job. She needed someone Wednesdays, I happen to have Wednesdays off.

My only complaint is lack of good coffee and good almond milk, Besides that I'm really liking it here. A lot :)

First Day of School

I'm so tired. But let's start from the beginning.

Today was my first official day of teaching. I've been here for over two weeks, so it was about time to finally start working. I got to school waaaay too early, met the principal, and then wandered around for half an hour. I should have brought a book.

When I was walking toward the first class, the students were walking in, and I heard them all whispering: "that's the English teacher!"

The first teacher looked frightening similar to my 11th grade math teacher which, in case you didn't go to high school with me, is a bad thing. For that class I basically introduced myself and then mostly observed the class for 35 minutes. Then I had my second class with a teacher who was really nice, but he seemed really nervous about his English. I felt bad for him. That class was 35 minutes, and then there was a half hour of recess. I should have brought a book.

I went outside and a group of students swarmed me and started asking me questions, it was pretty adorable. One of the girls asked me if we really have aliens in the US, because she saw it on some show. I said no. Then she asked if we have haunted houses, to which I said yes. Her eyes got huge, "vraiment!?" I thought she meant fake haunted houses, like what we do around Halloween, but I'm pretty sure I told a little girl that ghosts are real in the U.S. Oops.

After that I had my third class, which was the first class I had with the really young kids, 25 minutes long. For the most part the kids just asked me questions about the US, for some reason they couldn't get over the fact that we do such barbaric things as eat omelettes for breakfast. And sometimes potatoes.

The class after that was 35 minutes with some of the older kids I had met during the break. They were all really curious and super excited to ask questions.

Then the famous two-hour lunch break. I ate with the other teachers which was a little awkward. Adults are intimidating, especially in French. I had so much time I was able to tram back home, put away my lunch bag, and come back. I should have brought a book.

After that 2 more 35 minute classes, another break, and a 25 minute class.

Overall I introduced myself about a thousand times, I explained the difference between the two Washingtons about five thousand times, I asked students what their names were about ten thousand times, and I explained breakfast in the U.S. about eight thousand times.

To be honest, suddenly being thrown into a full day of that was a bit of a shock, I barely even remember what happened today. After work I bought some food, trammed home and flopped on my bed, I haven't moved since. It was fun though, I'm glad I got little kids, they seem really interested in whatever knowledge I have of the outside world. They also seem a lot less judgmental than older kids, so I'm not scared to speak French in front of them (which, contrary to what I was told, is very much a necessity, their English is basically non-existent), I actually prefer speaking French with kids than with adults. It was a little awkward because the teachers don't seem to be very well-organized when it comes to English, we basically just made up the lesson plan as we went. "Hm....okay why don't we talk about weather or something?" It's also insane how much free time I have. I'm there for seven hours, but, if you do the math, I'm only actually in class for about four of them. From now on I'll make sure to bring a book with me.

Donc voila. Mon travail. It's hard to believe that when I signed up for french eight years ago I was prepping myself for this.

My schedule

In case anyone is interested

Annecy

Five assistants and I took a day trip over to Annecy. It's an incredibly picturesque little town a couple of hours away by train. As always the other assistants were great and overall it was really fun: lots of laughing and talking and ice cream. Although I was a bit disappointed: as pretty as Annecy is, once you walk around the old part of the city and the lake, there isn't much to do, so we ended up leaving earlier than we had planned. But even so it was really fun, and like I said, beautiful place.

Stage

Ah le stage, the official beginning of our time as language assistants. It was essentially a two-day training session which was both mentally exhausting and incredibly fun. 

The exhausting part: 

Day one we sat in a big room for nearly three hours where nicely-dressed French people talked at us about aaaaaaall the administrative stuff we had to do. They explained the French education system, our job as assistants, the importance of a RIB (bank-related crap), housing, the paperwork needed for non-EU assistants to send in to make an appointment for our obligatory medical exam so we don't get deported, the paperwork we need to bring to said medical exam, the paperwork needed to sign up for the mandatory French sécu (insurance), how to send in said paperwork, what kind of proof of housing we need if we live alone, rent a room, or live with a family... geez, just writing this list is exhausting. Honestly France...I swear you are responsible for half of the world's deforestation. But it was to be expected, France is notorious for its bureaucracy. I think all our brains melted a little bit after that. Last year when I was in Montpellier, we had a similar meeting, three hours in a boiling hot room listening to a language I then only half-understood talking about paperwork and photocopies and signatures, ack. That was the one time in my life I legitimately felt I needed a drink. This reminded me of that.

After all this we took a bus to Autrans, a little village/camp place in the mountains. We hadn't been fed lunch, as we had expected (we were told they would provide housing and food for free, considering they asked us to be there before 10:00 we expected lunch. Fooled by the French!) so we were starving and we didn't get dinner until 8:00 pm, where we had chips, bread, and potatoes au gratin. I just wish there had been more carbs, it just didn't quite feel French enough. They should have put it all on some pasta or something.

Day two we had more specific training. We were split up into groups by region and what level we were teaching. There we met our main dude, he has a title of some sort but I can't quite remember what it is, he's responsible for our administrative stuff. In any case, he was a really fantastic guy, very open and helpful. We filled out some paperwork with him (surprise surprise) and he explained some of it a little more clearly. Then after lunch we had a practice class, where he "taught us French" as you would a classroom of 6-11 year-olds, and we learned a French song about dipping a mouse in oil and it coming out as a snail, apparently a classic learned by all French children (listen to is here) ... I don't know. In all I think we were in "class" for like five hours that day.

The incredibly fun part: 

Meeting all the other assistants from all around the globe! Put a bunch of lonely polyglots who love to travel together in the same area and it's bound to be fun. Honestly they're all fantastic, and although I had already had a chance to meet a handful of them before, it was great to meet the whole gang. I had been worried that TAPIF would be a relatively lonely adventure, but it's turning out to be quite the opposite.

Before our first torture session on day one we had a group scavenger hunt around Grenoble. After the first torture session, as I said, we drove up to Autrans. The drive up was beautiful, and once we got there we were free to do as we pleased until dinner, so we wandered around for a few hours, found a little store (thank God) and ate (because the French don't know how to feed people), and then had dinner (see above). (I'm still trying to figure out how the French still have hair, they never seem to eat protein. Or vegetables. And only rarely fruit). Afterwords a few assistants and I sat around a talked for hours, mostly about all the things that want to kill you in Australia, and about koalas who apparently all have chlamydia or something, how Canadians have milk in bags, and a lot of "wait, what do you call this in Australia/the UK/Canada/the US? That's so weird, we call it such-and-such."

The next day we had breakfast at 7:30 (bread...bread...jam...cereal. Really France?) BUT! Big news! I finally tried Vegemite. One of the other assistants is Australian and, like a proper Aussie, brought her own tubes of the stuff. It was...confusing. I chewed it, I thought about it. I chewed it some more. Hmm... Salty, but more than that. In the end I decided that I don't really like it. I could get used to it I suppose, but... meh, not my thing. I'm glad I had it though.

For lunch they gave us hunks of bread the size of our heads with some tuna straight from the can. And then just in case a pound of bread wasn't enough they gave us an extra hunk of it with cheese. Sigh...oh France *shakes head*. When I got home I ate like half a can of lentils, I was craving protein/anything that wasn't sugar or wouldn't turn into sugar in five minutes.

Then after the second class we hung out for a few hours. The bus was late, so we waited an extra hour.

So like I said, exhausting, but really, really fun. Mostly fun. Some of the other regions only have a one-day stage, I'm glad ours was two, it gave us a chance to spread out the information a little bit, and more time to sit around and talk among ourselves.

Scavenger hunt

Add caption

Ma ville :) Elle est jolie, non?

The presentation that wouldn't end

Autrans

Diner: bread, bread, chips, potatoes. Consider this a warning America, let's just say the plane will be carrying a little more weight on the way back

Proper Aussie, spreading the good word. And the word is Vegemite. 

Day 2

Lunch

View during the drive back